Oh My God, I've cracked it!
After so many months yelling at the laptop screen and cursing Google my perserverance has paid off. Google has this clever way of not giving you any actual HELP contact details if you have a problem.... you simply click here, click there, click blimmin' everywhere until you (hopefully) figure it out. I had honestly given up all hope.... and you know what, I thought "Steph, that's not you... you don't give up that easily, don't let this beat you"... oh and I really couldn't be bothered starting a new blog from scratch.... all that time designing the template....... I was also quite staggered by how many people have said to me "I really enjoyed reading your blog, why did stop?" Just the push I needed to keep hanging in there.... like a chahuahua on the ankle! And you know what, it's bloody liberating to be back writing again, it feels so great!!
So, where the heck do I begin. I believe my last entry was in August last year.... woah, that's scary....... it's now almost March 2012. Shiiiiiittttttttt, a load of water under my bridge since then and well, I'm going to struggle to remember it all.
Let's see then..... in early August last year, Nats (my sister) and Grace (her daughter, my niece, 8 years) moved in with us. They stayed with us until early December. For the most part, it was actually really good and loads of fun and it was really wonderful for Harry and Grace to have had the time together.... they are very fortunate to have eachother. They had their moments, we all did. It was a busy LITTLE house, a messy little house and we've all managed to survive.
Mr 50 grumbled a bit along the way - fair enough, he had to forgo his "man's cave" for them to live in - and what a sacrifice that was! He coped remarkably well all in all, I was pleasantly surprised. It was more testing whwn Christmas was just round the corner and things were particularly busy for us. And well, it wouldn't be life without some drama. A week into December I "ever so nicely" issued the eviction notice, to softly softly move things along (subtle ay!) and well, within 2 days Nats found her and Grace some new digs and they moved out the following weekend! It was really great to have our home back and just be the three of us again.... really makes you grateful for what you have. We did miss them when they first moved out and now they are only 10 mins away and we are still seeing loads of eachother so it's all good. We can choose our friends, we can't choose our family and I think I'm actually pretty bloody lucky with mine. I love my sis, we're best friends and it works and I look back on those 4 months with great fondness and warmth. Don't know if I could do it again anytime soon though ha, ha!
Nick didn't end up having his 50th birthday party in August, we didn't go to Raro for our relaxing break, we haven't had a party at the cafe we were going to have and hey, life still goes on. Sure, we'd love a holiday and a party and they will happen, it just wasn't the right time for us last year...... exciting though, Raro is now June 2012 and Melbourne for me in May!
Harry turned 9 on 21 September last year. My big boy is growing so fast! It's such a priviledge and so truly amazing to have a child and see them grow in front of your eyes. He's a remarkable young man and I couldn't be more proud of him..... 9 is such a rocking good age, esp. for a boy! Love you Harry.
So, October last year, I turned 39... whooppeeeeee.... another year. I can't wait for my 40th this year! That's the real number I've been looking forward to.
November came and went, December, as always was a huge month, with end of year and Christmas...... it was utter chaos as always..... good chaos though... nothing too horrific to write home about.
We snuck off for our annual jaunt to beautiful Riwaka/Motueka in early Jan..... superb as always. Such a "basic" time when we're there, yet the most fulfilling.... those are the best holidays. Could have done with another week... hey, business don't stop for nobody!
Came back to a crazy, busy start to the year and it's just got busier since. I came in to 2012 with a whole new directive.... a new personal directive and a new business directive. Personally, my word for 2012 is DISCIPLINE.... as a mother, as a wife, as a sister, as a daughter, as a friend, simply in every aspect of being this person I am. I decided I didn't want another year of just dealing with things as they came along... I want to determine my path and be in control... well, at least when I haven't had a few delicious red wines LOL! I have stuck to this mantra and I'm feeling so empowered. I'm not talking gym discipline, diet discipline or anything too life threatening like they both sound to me.... simply a clear head with direction and some focus. This led me to feel calm and in control for my business year ahead. Other years, we've arrived back from Riwaka, I've been bummed out because I wanted to stay and not face the reality of what lay ahead.... hard work again for another year...... I know, it might sound strange... there are times I just think.... I could chuck it all in... it's a hard graft and I've had enough. And then I have my moments and realise, WHATEVER STEPH... this is yours for the picking, it's your life, you own it, you chose it, you can decide your destiny. So this year, I was focussed and got about writing our 2012 business plan over the Christmas period.... to be honest, it took quite a few weeks to write, confirm, agree and sign off.... which I think is probably not a bad thing all in all... as it meant I was determined to get it right. We've set ourselves some hefty goals for this year... and you know what, I am truly excited. I've got my (can't say the name of that other coffee company beginning with M with an O, then a J and another O) back and I'm giving it my all.
I'm going to wean Mr 50 away from the business.... he deserves some downtime... and I'm going to "get it on" in 2012. Watch this space....
Valentine's Day.... another day on the calendar... never a biggie for us... we love eachother every day of the year...., yeah whatever! We're now looming towards March, end of day light savings, end of a rather rubbish summer and heading in to my second favourite time of the year.....Autumn (Spring's my fav). I love Autumn when the trees turn amber and then loose their leaves, the air is cooler and the nights are just right for curling up with a blanket and a good book...... Can you tell I'm not a beach bunny! Pale skin... say no more.
I mentioned before, it's my 40th this year and well, I've been looking forward to this for many a year.... I have a plan for my party, one which was going to be for my 30th and I had a baby instead :-) 1920s flapper party... with all the trimmings. Oh yeah... bring it on!
I have booked a romantic night in town for week after next, for hubby and I, then a day off work the next day...... we won't know what's hit us. I have decided to head to Melbourne in May to the Melbourne Coffee Expo and of course, great excuse to stay with and catch up with girlfriends who live their... and shop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are FINALLY going to have our sunshine holiday in Raro, planning for June........ that will be such a treat... our first "proper" holiday since our belated honeymoon in 2006! I know, tragic.
Something else I've decided this year is.... and I know this will sound rather obvious to all your normal folk out there who actually do this sort of thing.... nothing happens when you make excuses! Last year we didn't have a party, we didn't go to Raro, we didn't this, we didn't that and kept saying... we're too busy, ohhh, we can't because of the businesses. Well you know what... yes we can and yes we are. 2012 is about discipline and being in control. Booking our dirty night in town and deciding to go to Melbourne and planning to go to Raro... how liberating... no excuses this year.
I've just looked at the time, I have to be up early as I have a new staff member starting at the cafe. It's going to be a big next couple of weeks, with another newbie starting on Friday.... training, training, training for me! Shouldn't be too harrowing, they are both wonderful, of course. Just a wee shock to the system getting to the cafe at 6.30 am every day for the next couple of weeks.
It's great to be back, to be "speaking" to the universe once again. My final thoughts for today are from me..... cherish today, look forward to tomorrow, plan for the future and don't ever look back with regret.
See you anon
Feb 26, 2012
Aug 28, 2011
Time flies when your not necessarily having fun...
Master 9 asked me "what does it mean mummy, time flies when you're having fun?" Didn't take much explanation and he understood. He then added "it can also go fast when you're not having fun though". He's so right. I had a full on week and to be honest, not all of it was the best on record and I'm just pleased it did go quickly.
It's Sunday 28 August and my last blog was over a week ago. Therein lies my conclusion, this is my 'Sunday blog'. A rant at the end of each week; my time to reflect on everything which has happened over the course of the past 7 days - if only I could remember back that far! This week past, let's see. Monday, oh yes. In town with new customer, barista training. Tuesday, over in Martinborough with new customer, barista training. Wednesday, Miramar, fairly gruelling sales pitch for new business. Thursday, in town, meetings and new customer visit then networking function in the evening, followed by night out on the tiles - Note to self: Don't bloody drink on a school night Steph!!!!!!! You're too damn old to function the next day. Friday, terribly hungover and useless for most the day.
It never ceases to amaze me how much I can cram in to one week and that's just the work stuff! Then there's relationship, friends, family, children, reading, social media, cooking, cleaning, need I say more...... it tires me just reading this paragraph. Some how though, through it all, I find the strength and fortitude to carry on, pick myself up, put a smile on the dial and soldier on. It comes back to "the secret". That great little book and DVD which came to market in a flurry a few years ago and transformed so many people's lives - me being one of them. When I first read it, I was converted and lived every day like a worshipping Tom Cruise Scientologist. Nowadays, I use it to find positive energy, carparks and remember what I'm grateful for. Despite not using "the secret" to my full advantage, I think it's found some place in my psychy (spel??) and I'm all the better for it. You see, you have to believe in something to get through this life and well, I've chosen to believe in me and my ability to attract and project a positive existence. Nothing more really. I'm not a God fairing person, I think I'm agnostic, or is that an atheist, I'm not sure and that's pretty much where I leave it. There's something out there, I just don't know what and I conclude, it's a source of powerful energy which we can choose to draw from and live a positive and energised existence. I do believe our destiny's are predetermined and we're fairly powerless to change their greater path otherwise however, we can determine how far down a road we go before we choose to 'hang a left' at the next intersection. Ultimately though, I believe we'll end up at the same destination, as that's the path which is carved for us; we'll just have some different experiences on the way, than if we'd stayed on the other road. I believe everything happens for a reason, I believe in Karma. I believe we have the power to control our situations and we're ultimately responsible for our own happiness. That was deep!
So, why is it then I have week's when I'm not totally happy. Am I not living by my own advice and allowing the positive to prevail. You know what I've concluded, it's because no-one person is infalible. We all have weaknesses and sometimes it all hits us at once and we fall down.
This week's been particularly interesting. My personal life is uneven and we're experiencing upheaval. I know it's going to be fine, we have a strong foundation and ultimately we are destined to be together. I'm not going to let that go. It's just difficult to see the light sometimes.
By Thursday I was feeling pretty tired. I'd been running from one end of the greater Wellington region to the other and was chasing my tail. On Thursday afternoon, a beacon of light prevailed. We received an email we'd been hoping for. I'm not going to go in to detail suffice to say, we've been asked to take our coffee to Hong Kong!!! I know, monumental. The biggest opportunity we've been presented in our professional relationship, as husband and wife in business. What transpired after the news was interesting. I was in disbelief and overwhelming excitement and Nick, well, he was as pragmatic as ever and not overly excited. This lead to my subconscious rebellion. I was celebrating and was going to have some fun! I was already heading in to town on Thursday night with my girls from work, to attend a womens networking with drinkies and nibbles and let our hair down. This was already planned for weeks. To top all this off with the Hong Kong news was a recipe for a bloody good night. Only problem, I over did it. I was in control and had a superb evening and let myself down by mixing my drinks. Comes Friday morning I was a write off! It's fair to say, I've had my share of wicked hangovers over the years - I'm a sucker for punishment and this one was no exception. I was sick until 1 pm on Thursday. I was physically sick too, so not pretty. What a come down. Not setting a very good example for my staff let alone myself. Nick was in a not so great place and I wasn't available to suppport him. This all accumulated in being a rather emotional Friday.
I struggled through the day, got there in the end. Nick and I have settled our differences, at least for now and we've reached a calm spot. I've had the weekend off alcohol which has been great. I've managed to do some washing, take my husband clothes shopping - oh of course, I didn't mention this week everything turned 180 and now Nick's coming to fashion week with me, not my sister. That's next time's blog....... I've coooked meals, I've washed and cleaned up. I've cleaned out the cat box, ewwwwww, I've entertained my son's friends, I've caught up with friends. I've placated my sister, my staff and managed to bring my husband back down to earth. Nothing his new haircut and clothes couldn't have done sooner - the power of looking, then feeling great and you know what. Sitting here finishing this entry, I feel quite happy. Happy I have a chance to become something better tomorrow and be something more for me and for others.
WHAT A WEEK!
Nothing is clearer right now...... Amazing how much can happen in so little time....and time for some major changes......
My last words:
You can't love anyone else until you learn to love yourself
It's Sunday 28 August and my last blog was over a week ago. Therein lies my conclusion, this is my 'Sunday blog'. A rant at the end of each week; my time to reflect on everything which has happened over the course of the past 7 days - if only I could remember back that far! This week past, let's see. Monday, oh yes. In town with new customer, barista training. Tuesday, over in Martinborough with new customer, barista training. Wednesday, Miramar, fairly gruelling sales pitch for new business. Thursday, in town, meetings and new customer visit then networking function in the evening, followed by night out on the tiles - Note to self: Don't bloody drink on a school night Steph!!!!!!! You're too damn old to function the next day. Friday, terribly hungover and useless for most the day.
It never ceases to amaze me how much I can cram in to one week and that's just the work stuff! Then there's relationship, friends, family, children, reading, social media, cooking, cleaning, need I say more...... it tires me just reading this paragraph. Some how though, through it all, I find the strength and fortitude to carry on, pick myself up, put a smile on the dial and soldier on. It comes back to "the secret". That great little book and DVD which came to market in a flurry a few years ago and transformed so many people's lives - me being one of them. When I first read it, I was converted and lived every day like a worshipping Tom Cruise Scientologist. Nowadays, I use it to find positive energy, carparks and remember what I'm grateful for. Despite not using "the secret" to my full advantage, I think it's found some place in my psychy (spel??) and I'm all the better for it. You see, you have to believe in something to get through this life and well, I've chosen to believe in me and my ability to attract and project a positive existence. Nothing more really. I'm not a God fairing person, I think I'm agnostic, or is that an atheist, I'm not sure and that's pretty much where I leave it. There's something out there, I just don't know what and I conclude, it's a source of powerful energy which we can choose to draw from and live a positive and energised existence. I do believe our destiny's are predetermined and we're fairly powerless to change their greater path otherwise however, we can determine how far down a road we go before we choose to 'hang a left' at the next intersection. Ultimately though, I believe we'll end up at the same destination, as that's the path which is carved for us; we'll just have some different experiences on the way, than if we'd stayed on the other road. I believe everything happens for a reason, I believe in Karma. I believe we have the power to control our situations and we're ultimately responsible for our own happiness. That was deep!
So, why is it then I have week's when I'm not totally happy. Am I not living by my own advice and allowing the positive to prevail. You know what I've concluded, it's because no-one person is infalible. We all have weaknesses and sometimes it all hits us at once and we fall down.
This week's been particularly interesting. My personal life is uneven and we're experiencing upheaval. I know it's going to be fine, we have a strong foundation and ultimately we are destined to be together. I'm not going to let that go. It's just difficult to see the light sometimes.
By Thursday I was feeling pretty tired. I'd been running from one end of the greater Wellington region to the other and was chasing my tail. On Thursday afternoon, a beacon of light prevailed. We received an email we'd been hoping for. I'm not going to go in to detail suffice to say, we've been asked to take our coffee to Hong Kong!!! I know, monumental. The biggest opportunity we've been presented in our professional relationship, as husband and wife in business. What transpired after the news was interesting. I was in disbelief and overwhelming excitement and Nick, well, he was as pragmatic as ever and not overly excited. This lead to my subconscious rebellion. I was celebrating and was going to have some fun! I was already heading in to town on Thursday night with my girls from work, to attend a womens networking with drinkies and nibbles and let our hair down. This was already planned for weeks. To top all this off with the Hong Kong news was a recipe for a bloody good night. Only problem, I over did it. I was in control and had a superb evening and let myself down by mixing my drinks. Comes Friday morning I was a write off! It's fair to say, I've had my share of wicked hangovers over the years - I'm a sucker for punishment and this one was no exception. I was sick until 1 pm on Thursday. I was physically sick too, so not pretty. What a come down. Not setting a very good example for my staff let alone myself. Nick was in a not so great place and I wasn't available to suppport him. This all accumulated in being a rather emotional Friday.
I struggled through the day, got there in the end. Nick and I have settled our differences, at least for now and we've reached a calm spot. I've had the weekend off alcohol which has been great. I've managed to do some washing, take my husband clothes shopping - oh of course, I didn't mention this week everything turned 180 and now Nick's coming to fashion week with me, not my sister. That's next time's blog....... I've coooked meals, I've washed and cleaned up. I've cleaned out the cat box, ewwwwww, I've entertained my son's friends, I've caught up with friends. I've placated my sister, my staff and managed to bring my husband back down to earth. Nothing his new haircut and clothes couldn't have done sooner - the power of looking, then feeling great and you know what. Sitting here finishing this entry, I feel quite happy. Happy I have a chance to become something better tomorrow and be something more for me and for others.
WHAT A WEEK!
Nothing is clearer right now...... Amazing how much can happen in so little time....and time for some major changes......
My last words:
You can't love anyone else until you learn to love yourself
Aug 21, 2011
Amazing how much can change in just a few days....
It never ceases to amaze me what life can throw at us and how we cope through it all. Between Wednesday last week and today (Sunday), my life's been turned 360 degrees! I haven't blogged due to a relationship crisis, coupled with business dramas and top it all off a head cold. This left me with little energy and certainly very few positive vibes to generate a healthy prose and pen something journal worthy.
It started on Wednesday afternoon with Mr 50 having the "second coming" of his midlife crisis. God, I really feel for him. I can't for a minute begin to imagine what he's experiencing. I'm not even 39 and I'm a woman, which means I'm embracing my ageing process, not dreading it. I'm sure he'll be fine and at the moment, I need to nuture and love him and help him through. I really didn't feel like nuturing him last week, more like murdering him LOL! I'm not going to go in to detail, as most of what transpired is extremely personal. I will say though, it was a tough few days for both of us and it really tested our tenacity - in our relationship and our business.
See the reality for us is, we're husband and wife AND we're in business together. Now, I know we're not the first couple of be married and in business and we sure won't be the last (I would highly recommend thinking long and hard about this if you're considering the plunge in to business with the other half, no matter how strong your relationship is and how much you love them). It's like when people say they know what it's like to have a baby because they've had younger siblings or nieces and nephews they've had around. Poo to that! You can't possibly know what it's like to have a babe until you actually have one. It turns your life upside down and nothing is ever the same EVER AGAIN! It's not to say it's a bad thing, it's just the stark reality. Being in business, let alone being in business with your beloved, is exactly the same. You can't possibly know what it's like until you do it.
The lines between personal and business get blurred. No matter how much you try and what measures you put in place to keep the divide clear, it's inevitable the lines will cross and therein lies the problem. You see, when you get to a point, like we are, when you have 1 main business, 1 cafe off that business, another sister business to the main business, a child, 1 husband working a fulltime job at the Fire Service and all the other stuff that life throws at you, well, it's pretty full on at the best of times. We're pretty resilient and just keep on running on the treadmill and sometimes, the treadmill gets sped up when we're not looking and we fall off the end. I think the bit that fecks me off sometimes is some people actually think (and have said) wow, you're so lucky, you're life is glamourous and you must be rolling in it! WHATEVER! Far bloody from it - a long way to go before we make our millions, or million. One of my favourite business sayings "it takes 10 years to become an overnight success". We're at year 7! You know what, we chose our path and we're the first to remind ourselves of this fact. I wouldn't want it any other way. Well, most the time anyway.
Anyway, this week was a right royal doozie. Nick and I argued, cried and almost made some very wrong decisions, both personally and professionally. Thank God we've been together long enough to know we're solid and we have eachother's backs. We're chalk and cheese. Nick's the pragmatic realist and I'm the fly by night visionary. He's a Leo, I'm a Libran. I read once we were the perfect relationship match and ultimately would be together forever... although watch out, it will definitely be firey at times and test your resilience. This is us wholeheartedly and this is why we work.
By Saturday our "stars" were aligning again. We were back in Zen. Thank God, because I just hate the uncertainty which surrounds us when we have these moments. My equalibrium is totally rocked and it shakes me to the core. I can breath again now.
We've had a great weekend with the kids. I just loved the snow, it was magical and now I think having the sun out has made a huge difference for all of us. The kids have been outside bike riding and playing. Life seems normal again - what's normal?? I've got a really busy week coming up and to be honest, I'm feeling a little overwhelmed about what I've got to achieve in such a short space of time. Hey, what's new! In my usual fashion, I will tackle it head on and JUST DO IT!
I quite often find myself saying (either to myself or to others) isn't it amazing when we're in a particular situation with what we perceive to be a major life "drama" upon us, how we actually get through it - sometimes more smoothly than others and we're always here to talk about it, whether it's days, weeks or months later. What seems sometimes to be the end of life as we know it, what appears to be the darkest and most challenging and sometimes scary times in our lives, pass by and we survive! That leads me to believe, honestly, nothing is impossible, nothing can truly stop you if you're determined enough, have warmth in your heart, people who love you in your life and a determination to make the most of every day. It's all just the journey of life. It's the experiences which shape us, make us grow, learn and become who we are. It's problem solving at its most prolific.
So, my LAST WORDS are from my very own husband, a wise man who said to me once:
Sometimes we have to reach the very bottom before we can go up.
It started on Wednesday afternoon with Mr 50 having the "second coming" of his midlife crisis. God, I really feel for him. I can't for a minute begin to imagine what he's experiencing. I'm not even 39 and I'm a woman, which means I'm embracing my ageing process, not dreading it. I'm sure he'll be fine and at the moment, I need to nuture and love him and help him through. I really didn't feel like nuturing him last week, more like murdering him LOL! I'm not going to go in to detail, as most of what transpired is extremely personal. I will say though, it was a tough few days for both of us and it really tested our tenacity - in our relationship and our business.
See the reality for us is, we're husband and wife AND we're in business together. Now, I know we're not the first couple of be married and in business and we sure won't be the last (I would highly recommend thinking long and hard about this if you're considering the plunge in to business with the other half, no matter how strong your relationship is and how much you love them). It's like when people say they know what it's like to have a baby because they've had younger siblings or nieces and nephews they've had around. Poo to that! You can't possibly know what it's like to have a babe until you actually have one. It turns your life upside down and nothing is ever the same EVER AGAIN! It's not to say it's a bad thing, it's just the stark reality. Being in business, let alone being in business with your beloved, is exactly the same. You can't possibly know what it's like until you do it.
The lines between personal and business get blurred. No matter how much you try and what measures you put in place to keep the divide clear, it's inevitable the lines will cross and therein lies the problem. You see, when you get to a point, like we are, when you have 1 main business, 1 cafe off that business, another sister business to the main business, a child, 1 husband working a fulltime job at the Fire Service and all the other stuff that life throws at you, well, it's pretty full on at the best of times. We're pretty resilient and just keep on running on the treadmill and sometimes, the treadmill gets sped up when we're not looking and we fall off the end. I think the bit that fecks me off sometimes is some people actually think (and have said) wow, you're so lucky, you're life is glamourous and you must be rolling in it! WHATEVER! Far bloody from it - a long way to go before we make our millions, or million. One of my favourite business sayings "it takes 10 years to become an overnight success". We're at year 7! You know what, we chose our path and we're the first to remind ourselves of this fact. I wouldn't want it any other way. Well, most the time anyway.
Anyway, this week was a right royal doozie. Nick and I argued, cried and almost made some very wrong decisions, both personally and professionally. Thank God we've been together long enough to know we're solid and we have eachother's backs. We're chalk and cheese. Nick's the pragmatic realist and I'm the fly by night visionary. He's a Leo, I'm a Libran. I read once we were the perfect relationship match and ultimately would be together forever... although watch out, it will definitely be firey at times and test your resilience. This is us wholeheartedly and this is why we work.
By Saturday our "stars" were aligning again. We were back in Zen. Thank God, because I just hate the uncertainty which surrounds us when we have these moments. My equalibrium is totally rocked and it shakes me to the core. I can breath again now.
We've had a great weekend with the kids. I just loved the snow, it was magical and now I think having the sun out has made a huge difference for all of us. The kids have been outside bike riding and playing. Life seems normal again - what's normal?? I've got a really busy week coming up and to be honest, I'm feeling a little overwhelmed about what I've got to achieve in such a short space of time. Hey, what's new! In my usual fashion, I will tackle it head on and JUST DO IT!
I quite often find myself saying (either to myself or to others) isn't it amazing when we're in a particular situation with what we perceive to be a major life "drama" upon us, how we actually get through it - sometimes more smoothly than others and we're always here to talk about it, whether it's days, weeks or months later. What seems sometimes to be the end of life as we know it, what appears to be the darkest and most challenging and sometimes scary times in our lives, pass by and we survive! That leads me to believe, honestly, nothing is impossible, nothing can truly stop you if you're determined enough, have warmth in your heart, people who love you in your life and a determination to make the most of every day. It's all just the journey of life. It's the experiences which shape us, make us grow, learn and become who we are. It's problem solving at its most prolific.
So, my LAST WORDS are from my very own husband, a wise man who said to me once:
Sometimes we have to reach the very bottom before we can go up.
Aug 17, 2011
I've got a cold!!!!!
Grrr, I thought I'd beaten the winter blues this year and managed to get through without getting a cold. Epic fail! Not a major cold, more an annoying itchy eyes and runny nose. I really hate being sick, at any level. The irony is, I sometimes think, wouldn't it be nice to get a "little" cold and have to stay at home for a day in bed. And on the odd occasion it ever happens, I feel weird being at home when the rest of the world is whizzing by, beetling about doing there thing and I feel isolated, like I'm the only person left in the world. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy my own company, just preferably when I have something to do and am not sitting at home in my nighty feeling a bit blah! So for me, I'd rather take some drugs and go to work and get on with it. I guess that says something about me - I can't sit still, even when I'm sick!
Yesterday it snowed, A LOT, in Lower Hutt. I have lived in Wellington all my life and I'm almost 40 and have never, ever, ever stood in actual falling, gorgeous, flakes of beauty! It was just the most heart warming, amazing experience. I was 10 years old all over again and felt warm inside. It's just wonderful to see everyone walking and driving around with big smiles on their faces, esp Master 9 having so much fun with his friends. Sadly their fun turned to chaos when they decided to use Dad's lawn as their snow sliding platform. They churned up the lawn and well, let's just say, Nick's not a happy camper. He's anal about his lawn and his garden. I'm just pleased I wasn't there to see the fallout and I actually chuckled to myself when he told me and seemed so peeved. After all, the kids were just being kids and there's worse things going on in the world going than the demise of his lawn! Build a bridge Mr "I'm 50, woah is me", boo hoo!
Today I've booked flights and accommodation (overnight) to Auckland on 30 August to attend "New Zealand Fashion Week". Yep, I was sent an invitation by the lovely team at Starfish clothing. What a thrill! I'm soooooooooooooooooooo stoked and I was even so cheeky as to ask if I could bring along a + 1, in the form of my sister and they said YES!!! So, we've booked our flights, we've booked a hotel, we're already discussing what to wear and all BEFORE I've mentioned this to Mr 50! I can hear it now, huh, what about me, what am I, chopped liver. Now please don't get me completely wrong, Nick is a wonderful, kind, loving, caring husband, dad, friend and lover. He sounds terribly grumpy I know and to be fair, he's not entirely awful :-). He's just very "equal opportunity" oriented and so if I get an invite to something, he automatically thinks he should get one too! Fat chance mate. It's a girl's trip and you're staying at home to babysit. God I'm evil!
So many exciting things in my life at the moment, both professionally and personally and I feel really fortunate. I am a true believer in "everything happens for a reason" and I don't fight it. The world moves in mysterious ways and Karma is always playing with us. It's hard to not think about the future and what might be and we tend to spend too much time thinking about that instead of what's really important, which is today, right here, right now. I was about to write some deep and meaning quote and then caught myself.... I'll end up sounding like a self help book. I'm not a life coach or a counsellor, I'm just a real woman who has dreams and aspirations, who is taking one little day at a time and hoping I don't piss off too many people along the way.
And my "Last Words" for today:
What a strange thing man is; and what a stranger thing woman - let's celebrate just that!
Yesterday it snowed, A LOT, in Lower Hutt. I have lived in Wellington all my life and I'm almost 40 and have never, ever, ever stood in actual falling, gorgeous, flakes of beauty! It was just the most heart warming, amazing experience. I was 10 years old all over again and felt warm inside. It's just wonderful to see everyone walking and driving around with big smiles on their faces, esp Master 9 having so much fun with his friends. Sadly their fun turned to chaos when they decided to use Dad's lawn as their snow sliding platform. They churned up the lawn and well, let's just say, Nick's not a happy camper. He's anal about his lawn and his garden. I'm just pleased I wasn't there to see the fallout and I actually chuckled to myself when he told me and seemed so peeved. After all, the kids were just being kids and there's worse things going on in the world going than the demise of his lawn! Build a bridge Mr "I'm 50, woah is me", boo hoo!
Today I've booked flights and accommodation (overnight) to Auckland on 30 August to attend "New Zealand Fashion Week". Yep, I was sent an invitation by the lovely team at Starfish clothing. What a thrill! I'm soooooooooooooooooooo stoked and I was even so cheeky as to ask if I could bring along a + 1, in the form of my sister and they said YES!!! So, we've booked our flights, we've booked a hotel, we're already discussing what to wear and all BEFORE I've mentioned this to Mr 50! I can hear it now, huh, what about me, what am I, chopped liver. Now please don't get me completely wrong, Nick is a wonderful, kind, loving, caring husband, dad, friend and lover. He sounds terribly grumpy I know and to be fair, he's not entirely awful :-). He's just very "equal opportunity" oriented and so if I get an invite to something, he automatically thinks he should get one too! Fat chance mate. It's a girl's trip and you're staying at home to babysit. God I'm evil!
So many exciting things in my life at the moment, both professionally and personally and I feel really fortunate. I am a true believer in "everything happens for a reason" and I don't fight it. The world moves in mysterious ways and Karma is always playing with us. It's hard to not think about the future and what might be and we tend to spend too much time thinking about that instead of what's really important, which is today, right here, right now. I was about to write some deep and meaning quote and then caught myself.... I'll end up sounding like a self help book. I'm not a life coach or a counsellor, I'm just a real woman who has dreams and aspirations, who is taking one little day at a time and hoping I don't piss off too many people along the way.
And my "Last Words" for today:
What a strange thing man is; and what a stranger thing woman - let's celebrate just that!
Aug 15, 2011
The First Time I've Seen Snow in Wellington
This morning I decided (actually to be honest, it was last night before I went to bed) I was going to have what my Chef Jesse (who is a gorgeous Maori boy) calls a MDO - 'Maori Day Off'. I think that's priceless and only feel comfortable saying it cos he does! I didn't have a whole MDO, only a couple of hours in the morning. You know, I just felt like I wanted to go slow today and hey, after almost 7 years of grafting it in our business and honestly only having about 3 sicks days in the entire 7 years, I thought, buggar it. I work hard, I deserve it! Then I found myself justifying it all day. I felt guilty for sleeping in and taking it slow! Why????? Why is it women feel they can't take time out without having a nagging sense of guilt, oh and why do we always say SORRY!
Got to work at 11 am, still feeling guilty! Phoebe announced, "I've always wished it would snow on my birthday" and well, her wish came true. Phoebe works for me, she's the most gorgeous young woman and today she turned 24. She's a "mini me" - much like I was when I was in my 20s; just less outrageous, less outlandish and definitely not a flirt like I was and still am. She's happy, bubbly, outgoing, friendly and full of life, oh and never stops talking. She's part of the reason I want to write this blog, she inspires me and makes me want to remember life and reminds me of all the wonderful things I've done, people I've met and experiences and romances I've had.
For her birthday I gave her a card and in the card was an insert with this written on it:
Legends say that hummingbirds float free of time, carrying our hopes for love, joy and celebration. The hummingbird's delicate grace reinds us that life is rich, beauty is everywhere, every personal connection has meaning and that laughter is life's sweetest creation.
Phoebe's the hummingbird in my day. Today we watched as the snow flew past the windows of the cafe. I felt like a child again and was so excited when we stood outside and waived our arms around. For just a brief moment, nothing mattered. It's a great feeling acting like a kid every now and again and even adding the odd tantrum on occasion :-)
It's just after 5.30 pm and we're settled in for the evening. Finally managed to get some time on the laptop and my sister's standing here prattling on about something or other. Going from being sisters and best friends who see eachother very regularly, like almost daily, to having her move in is, well, different! I love my sister, no question about that. It's amazing though how I realise what my little intolerances are with people. I'll get over myself. After all, she and Grace, my 8 year old niece have moved in because they needed to be with family and have somewhere with stability whilst my sister gets her life back on track. Stop being selfish Steph and think how damn lucky you are having a warm home, a wonderful husband, a beautiful son, a wonderful business and a happy existence. If I can offer some of that to someone else, isn't that what life's about.
It's only really been recently I've started having those "if we're not alive to love and share life with family and friends and be there for them, then why are we here?" moments. It's become quite apparent to me people are what makes the difference in our lives. Yes, experiences are a part of what makes us who we are too. An old friend of mine came to see me recently to tell me he was dying - WOW! I'm not going to share the entire details of our 2 hour conversation other than to say, it sure makes you value being alive and well.
Enough rambling. Husband's pacing, reading over my shoulder to see what I'm writing. "What does that sentence mean" he asks? "Go away, it's not for your eyes" I say. "It's public viewing" he says. Perhaps the more diplomatic response would have been "nothing dear, you wouldn't get it, you're not a women". He's still lurking. I ask, "what are you doing". He says, "I can't use my computer and my Kindle (electronic book which I gave him for his birthday present - best present ever by the way, he loves it) is charging". So he's pacing around like a bored lion.
Master 9 just arrived in from the "snow" (hail actually) is grumpy and soaked to the bone. The fun quickly has turned to disappointment and irrtability. "Mummy, I'm wettttttt, my snow man is brokennnnnnn, I'm hungry, what can I put on", all with the terrible, high pitch whinge to back it up. What I want to reply is "so what, why do I care, I just want to sit here and drink my glass of red and write my blog". And in my head the fantasy goes something like Dad intervenes, get's him dry, clothes him, feeds him, tops up my glass of wine and starts cooking tea. Dream a little dream...... (do fly buys offer "timeout" for your points)?
Dinner, hmmmm, what to make. I stole some fresh chicken from my cafe this arvo, with the idea of throwing something together. Chicken, bacon, mushroom penne pasta it is then, with some vegetables on the side. Not Hubby's favourite - he wouldn't dare say so, he knows what's good for him.
There's one thing I do know, I drink too much. What's too much you might ask? Well, at least two glasses of wine every night. Red wine normally. I can't survive without it. It's another part of my life I struggle with. I don't justify it, which is interesting, I just carry guilt about it. I should stop, I should cut back, for me, for my son, for my husband, for my family, always in my mind..... what do you think?
So, my "last words" for today are drawn from someone in history who has impacted on my life. A person who was obviously born to have impact on people's lives for generations to come. He was a British politician, a statesman and widely regarded as one of the great wartime leaders. He was wise, he was extremely funny, with a quick wit and sarcasim I can truly relate to. Every day I learn more about him, he puts a smile on my face. He is Winston Churchill.
"Last Words"
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. Winston Churchill
Got to work at 11 am, still feeling guilty! Phoebe announced, "I've always wished it would snow on my birthday" and well, her wish came true. Phoebe works for me, she's the most gorgeous young woman and today she turned 24. She's a "mini me" - much like I was when I was in my 20s; just less outrageous, less outlandish and definitely not a flirt like I was and still am. She's happy, bubbly, outgoing, friendly and full of life, oh and never stops talking. She's part of the reason I want to write this blog, she inspires me and makes me want to remember life and reminds me of all the wonderful things I've done, people I've met and experiences and romances I've had.
For her birthday I gave her a card and in the card was an insert with this written on it:
Legends say that hummingbirds float free of time, carrying our hopes for love, joy and celebration. The hummingbird's delicate grace reinds us that life is rich, beauty is everywhere, every personal connection has meaning and that laughter is life's sweetest creation.
Phoebe's the hummingbird in my day. Today we watched as the snow flew past the windows of the cafe. I felt like a child again and was so excited when we stood outside and waived our arms around. For just a brief moment, nothing mattered. It's a great feeling acting like a kid every now and again and even adding the odd tantrum on occasion :-)
It's just after 5.30 pm and we're settled in for the evening. Finally managed to get some time on the laptop and my sister's standing here prattling on about something or other. Going from being sisters and best friends who see eachother very regularly, like almost daily, to having her move in is, well, different! I love my sister, no question about that. It's amazing though how I realise what my little intolerances are with people. I'll get over myself. After all, she and Grace, my 8 year old niece have moved in because they needed to be with family and have somewhere with stability whilst my sister gets her life back on track. Stop being selfish Steph and think how damn lucky you are having a warm home, a wonderful husband, a beautiful son, a wonderful business and a happy existence. If I can offer some of that to someone else, isn't that what life's about.
It's only really been recently I've started having those "if we're not alive to love and share life with family and friends and be there for them, then why are we here?" moments. It's become quite apparent to me people are what makes the difference in our lives. Yes, experiences are a part of what makes us who we are too. An old friend of mine came to see me recently to tell me he was dying - WOW! I'm not going to share the entire details of our 2 hour conversation other than to say, it sure makes you value being alive and well.
Enough rambling. Husband's pacing, reading over my shoulder to see what I'm writing. "What does that sentence mean" he asks? "Go away, it's not for your eyes" I say. "It's public viewing" he says. Perhaps the more diplomatic response would have been "nothing dear, you wouldn't get it, you're not a women". He's still lurking. I ask, "what are you doing". He says, "I can't use my computer and my Kindle (electronic book which I gave him for his birthday present - best present ever by the way, he loves it) is charging". So he's pacing around like a bored lion.
Master 9 just arrived in from the "snow" (hail actually) is grumpy and soaked to the bone. The fun quickly has turned to disappointment and irrtability. "Mummy, I'm wettttttt, my snow man is brokennnnnnn, I'm hungry, what can I put on", all with the terrible, high pitch whinge to back it up. What I want to reply is "so what, why do I care, I just want to sit here and drink my glass of red and write my blog". And in my head the fantasy goes something like Dad intervenes, get's him dry, clothes him, feeds him, tops up my glass of wine and starts cooking tea. Dream a little dream...... (do fly buys offer "timeout" for your points)?
Dinner, hmmmm, what to make. I stole some fresh chicken from my cafe this arvo, with the idea of throwing something together. Chicken, bacon, mushroom penne pasta it is then, with some vegetables on the side. Not Hubby's favourite - he wouldn't dare say so, he knows what's good for him.
There's one thing I do know, I drink too much. What's too much you might ask? Well, at least two glasses of wine every night. Red wine normally. I can't survive without it. It's another part of my life I struggle with. I don't justify it, which is interesting, I just carry guilt about it. I should stop, I should cut back, for me, for my son, for my husband, for my family, always in my mind..... what do you think?
So, my "last words" for today are drawn from someone in history who has impacted on my life. A person who was obviously born to have impact on people's lives for generations to come. He was a British politician, a statesman and widely regarded as one of the great wartime leaders. He was wise, he was extremely funny, with a quick wit and sarcasim I can truly relate to. Every day I learn more about him, he puts a smile on my face. He is Winston Churchill.
"Last Words"
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. Winston Churchill
Aug 14, 2011
The First Day of the Rest of My Life...
It's a rainy Sunday afternoon. The Pork Belly's in the oven (a gift from my sister who's just moved in to live with us for a few months with my niece).
I'm no chef, I really enjoy cooking and challenging myself in the kitchen, which doesn't happen nearly often enough. In fact, normally the biggest culinary challenge is "to cook or takeaways"!!!
I'm Steph Fry and I'm 39 in October. My life's been really fantastic and I can really see why women say they relish their 40s. I'm not quite there and I can feel it all starting to make sense.
For years now I've told myself, I'm going to start a journal. I'm going to capture all the thoughts in my head and enjoy reading over them in years to come. I have the best of intentions and well, just like "new year's resolutions", it just never comes to fruition (Love that word fruition)!
The last 18 months of my life in particular, have been a huge learning curve. I've learned so much in business and in life and I still have the nagging little voice in the back of my head saying 'write it down'! I have been writing some stuff down in a hardcopy journal and it's just not satisfying.
I've reached a point in my life where I've even started considering my (cliche) Bucket List. It's only got four things on it so far:
1. Write a Blog (even if no-one reads it, at least I'll have finally started a journal)
2. Get my short story published (I won a story competition when I was 10 and still have it on a cassette tape in my drawer)
3. Go to Tuscany (Lucky for me, this will happen in a couple of years, as my dear friend Denise will be turning 50 and the party's in Italy)!
4. Build an Eco Home in beautiful Riwaka, Motueka and .........
This blog is going to be an insight in to my life, my thoughts, my experiences, my learnings, my disapppointments and well, pretty much everything which I think I want to record for future reading enjoyment.
This is the first of my posts and I hope you enjoy, interact, respond, cheerish, laugh and find something you can relate to.
I will finish each blog with some "last words". A special saying, a quote or just a little snippet of life which I find relevant and special.
My first "last words" are something which tickled my fancy when I stood at the birthday card selection at the local bookstore, trying to choose a birthday card or two for my wonderful husband who has just turned 50. I chose a romantic card in which I wrote my usual prose of beautiful, endearing and loving words to his nibs and the other card, well, there's always a funny one, just to balance things out and 'keep it real' - one of my favourite sayings - keep it real!
Last Words - Age Doesn't Matter, Unless You're A cheese - Anon
I'm no chef, I really enjoy cooking and challenging myself in the kitchen, which doesn't happen nearly often enough. In fact, normally the biggest culinary challenge is "to cook or takeaways"!!!
I'm Steph Fry and I'm 39 in October. My life's been really fantastic and I can really see why women say they relish their 40s. I'm not quite there and I can feel it all starting to make sense.
For years now I've told myself, I'm going to start a journal. I'm going to capture all the thoughts in my head and enjoy reading over them in years to come. I have the best of intentions and well, just like "new year's resolutions", it just never comes to fruition (Love that word fruition)!
The last 18 months of my life in particular, have been a huge learning curve. I've learned so much in business and in life and I still have the nagging little voice in the back of my head saying 'write it down'! I have been writing some stuff down in a hardcopy journal and it's just not satisfying.
I've reached a point in my life where I've even started considering my (cliche) Bucket List. It's only got four things on it so far:
1. Write a Blog (even if no-one reads it, at least I'll have finally started a journal)
2. Get my short story published (I won a story competition when I was 10 and still have it on a cassette tape in my drawer)
3. Go to Tuscany (Lucky for me, this will happen in a couple of years, as my dear friend Denise will be turning 50 and the party's in Italy)!
4. Build an Eco Home in beautiful Riwaka, Motueka and .........
This blog is going to be an insight in to my life, my thoughts, my experiences, my learnings, my disapppointments and well, pretty much everything which I think I want to record for future reading enjoyment.
This is the first of my posts and I hope you enjoy, interact, respond, cheerish, laugh and find something you can relate to.
I will finish each blog with some "last words". A special saying, a quote or just a little snippet of life which I find relevant and special.
My first "last words" are something which tickled my fancy when I stood at the birthday card selection at the local bookstore, trying to choose a birthday card or two for my wonderful husband who has just turned 50. I chose a romantic card in which I wrote my usual prose of beautiful, endearing and loving words to his nibs and the other card, well, there's always a funny one, just to balance things out and 'keep it real' - one of my favourite sayings - keep it real!
Last Words - Age Doesn't Matter, Unless You're A cheese - Anon
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