It never ceases to amaze me what life can throw at us and how we cope through it all. Between Wednesday last week and today (Sunday), my life's been turned 360 degrees! I haven't blogged due to a relationship crisis, coupled with business dramas and top it all off a head cold. This left me with little energy and certainly very few positive vibes to generate a healthy prose and pen something journal worthy.
It started on Wednesday afternoon with Mr 50 having the "second coming" of his midlife crisis. God, I really feel for him. I can't for a minute begin to imagine what he's experiencing. I'm not even 39 and I'm a woman, which means I'm embracing my ageing process, not dreading it. I'm sure he'll be fine and at the moment, I need to nuture and love him and help him through. I really didn't feel like nuturing him last week, more like murdering him LOL! I'm not going to go in to detail, as most of what transpired is extremely personal. I will say though, it was a tough few days for both of us and it really tested our tenacity - in our relationship and our business.
See the reality for us is, we're husband and wife AND we're in business together. Now, I know we're not the first couple of be married and in business and we sure won't be the last (I would highly recommend thinking long and hard about this if you're considering the plunge in to business with the other half, no matter how strong your relationship is and how much you love them). It's like when people say they know what it's like to have a baby because they've had younger siblings or nieces and nephews they've had around. Poo to that! You can't possibly know what it's like to have a babe until you actually have one. It turns your life upside down and nothing is ever the same EVER AGAIN! It's not to say it's a bad thing, it's just the stark reality. Being in business, let alone being in business with your beloved, is exactly the same. You can't possibly know what it's like until you do it.
The lines between personal and business get blurred. No matter how much you try and what measures you put in place to keep the divide clear, it's inevitable the lines will cross and therein lies the problem. You see, when you get to a point, like we are, when you have 1 main business, 1 cafe off that business, another sister business to the main business, a child, 1 husband working a fulltime job at the Fire Service and all the other stuff that life throws at you, well, it's pretty full on at the best of times. We're pretty resilient and just keep on running on the treadmill and sometimes, the treadmill gets sped up when we're not looking and we fall off the end. I think the bit that fecks me off sometimes is some people actually think (and have said) wow, you're so lucky, you're life is glamourous and you must be rolling in it! WHATEVER! Far bloody from it - a long way to go before we make our millions, or million. One of my favourite business sayings "it takes 10 years to become an overnight success". We're at year 7! You know what, we chose our path and we're the first to remind ourselves of this fact. I wouldn't want it any other way. Well, most the time anyway.
Anyway, this week was a right royal doozie. Nick and I argued, cried and almost made some very wrong decisions, both personally and professionally. Thank God we've been together long enough to know we're solid and we have eachother's backs. We're chalk and cheese. Nick's the pragmatic realist and I'm the fly by night visionary. He's a Leo, I'm a Libran. I read once we were the perfect relationship match and ultimately would be together forever... although watch out, it will definitely be firey at times and test your resilience. This is us wholeheartedly and this is why we work.
By Saturday our "stars" were aligning again. We were back in Zen. Thank God, because I just hate the uncertainty which surrounds us when we have these moments. My equalibrium is totally rocked and it shakes me to the core. I can breath again now.
We've had a great weekend with the kids. I just loved the snow, it was magical and now I think having the sun out has made a huge difference for all of us. The kids have been outside bike riding and playing. Life seems normal again - what's normal?? I've got a really busy week coming up and to be honest, I'm feeling a little overwhelmed about what I've got to achieve in such a short space of time. Hey, what's new! In my usual fashion, I will tackle it head on and JUST DO IT!
I quite often find myself saying (either to myself or to others) isn't it amazing when we're in a particular situation with what we perceive to be a major life "drama" upon us, how we actually get through it - sometimes more smoothly than others and we're always here to talk about it, whether it's days, weeks or months later. What seems sometimes to be the end of life as we know it, what appears to be the darkest and most challenging and sometimes scary times in our lives, pass by and we survive! That leads me to believe, honestly, nothing is impossible, nothing can truly stop you if you're determined enough, have warmth in your heart, people who love you in your life and a determination to make the most of every day. It's all just the journey of life. It's the experiences which shape us, make us grow, learn and become who we are. It's problem solving at its most prolific.
So, my LAST WORDS are from my very own husband, a wise man who said to me once:
Sometimes we have to reach the very bottom before we can go up.
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